Take A Step Back, and Breath

Happy Tuesday Everyone,

As you can see my blog posts are now being released on Tuesday. This will probably be a normal occurrence since Monday’s are usually my catch-up days from the weekend, and it is a lot easier to post on Tuesday then Monday!

With that being said, today I am going to talk about the stress of planning an event. Every client I have had in my 3 years of event planning, whether that client is hosting a wedding or corporate event, always comes to me and the first thing they say is “event planning is too stressful.” For me it’s difficult to see the stress because it’s my job and I love what I do, but for those who aren’t used to planning events I can understand the stress. Over the years I have narrowed down the reason for stress by 2 factors. These 2 factors are perfection and pleasing the guest. While these factors are important they are not the essence of an event and I will try to explain how to overcome these 2 stress factors and how they often effect each other.

Perfection. It’s what everyone strives to be not just in events but in everyday life. We want that perfect job, that perfect house, that perfect car, we want our clothes, hair, make-up to be perfect, and of course we want all of our events to be perfect. Unfortunately life is not perfect, and I am not trying to sound depressing or negative, but life can not be perfect, because perfection is different in everyone’s eyes. For example, when you where a kid your mother probably told you to make your bed every morning. Well in your mother’s eyes a perfect bed would be one with no wrinkles and fluffed pillows neatly arranged over a mattress. For a child a perfectly made bed is one that has sheets, blankets, and pillows on it, the arrangement of those items usually aren’t important. So, as you can see both the mother and child view a perfectly made bed in completely different ways. As an event host you may believe the perfect event has to have flowers on tables and hand passed appetizers with white gloved servers, while another host may believe the perfect event includes paper plates and an appetizer buffet. All in all there is no such thing as a perfect event because everyone has a different view of perfection. The only perfection that matters is yours. If the event is how you picture it and how you want it then it is perfect, do not worry about what your guests will say or think.

That brings us to our second factor, pleasing the guest. Every human being has an opinion and unfortunately jealousy can take over and those opinions can be exaggerated. There is no way to stop the opinions while planning an event but there is a way to disregard them politely. Always remember that the only opinion that matters is yours. As an event planner I have my own opinions, but I know that the event is not mine and my opinion does not fit in any situation. There is no way that you will please every guest. There will always be someone that doesn’t like the events colors, the theme, the food, or the venue. It is impossible to please an entire group. What is possible is making yourself proud and happy with the final outcome. If the colors, the theme, the food, and the venue are perfect in your eyes, it does not matter what your uncle thinks of the appetizers, or what your grandmother thinks of your colors. If the event is perfect for you, that is all that matters.

Stress is a funny thing. It shows in people differently, and everyone overcomes it differently as well. I truly believe that stress is less present in a situation if you are happy and having fun in that situation. So the most important thing to do when planning an event to make it less stressful is to have fun with it and let it make you happy. Dolly Parton states it pretty clearly:

“If you don’t like the road you’re walking, start paving another one.”

Dolly Parton

In other words if you are not having fun planning an event, and it is not coming together how you want it to, stop, take a breath, and make it your event, not an event using everyone’s opinion. My favorite advice to give to a client who is stressing about an event is to take a step back. Take a weekend and go away even if it’s an hour up the road. Get a hotel room for a night, take a walk, go for a hike, do something that destresses you and start over. Clear your mind and figure out how exactly you want that event and when you get back to planning the next week make the improvements to your event that will make you happy and that will decrease stress for you.

Often times as an event planner I feel like an event therapist, and that never bother’s me. I am more than happy to be someone my client trusts to vent too. For all my present and future clients, never be afraid to tell me what you want and vent about the things that are bothering you. I am here to listen and will not judge or voice an opinion!

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